Making sure your student has the support they need to apply to college

We love the parents we work with, they want everything for their kids, most have applied to and gone to college, and they want that experience for their kids as well. But, if you're like us, applying to, and going to college a few years ago (we won't discuss how many "a few" is) was a very different activity and experience. And, in most cases it was too long ago to remember our own thoughts on the process.

Our parents didn't go with us to visit schools, it wasn't because they didn't care, it was because it just wasn't done. We went with a friend, visited a few schools, and applied to five or six. Remember pouring over the big thick books listing colleges? Handwriting applications? Rewriting the same essay over and over, tweaking it slightly for each school? Sending it by snail mail and praying it got there by the deadline? Well, if you're starting the college application process things are VERY different now and unfortunately for some families it is very stressful. 

So, what's the most frequent comment we hear from parents? "I wish I could help my son/daughter but it's so different." I hear it every day, OR from some parents I hear "they're finally thinking about college, I wish this had happened sooner but they have so much school work to do too." It's hard to encourage some students to get engaged, it may feel distant, it may feel overwhelming as it is one more "must do" on their list, it may feel uncomfortable as it is the "first great unknown step" in a journey that may set the path for the rest of their lives.

Our advice to parents of rising Seniors is to know what help you need and when you need it. Know when and how you can help them go from being overwhelmed with college options and application requirements, to having a plan and getting it done. As a parent, you have to push the process forward and some days that will feel like pushing a boulder up a bumpy hill. You'll have to draw a line and be OK with the college list so they can start the applications. There will always be a school that could have been a good fit that you didn't know about. Here are some tips:

• Learn from our blogs they explain different degrees (BFA, BA, BS, AA), different application deadlines (ED, EA, RD, Rolling), semesters vs quarters, interdisciplinary majors, and highlight programs at different schools.

• Decide together what your chances of acceptance are, what you can afford, and where each school fits on your priority list. Then decide when you want applications submitted and put the deadlines and requirements on a calendar, gradually checking off all the parts as they are completed.

• Make a list of all the supplemental essays and let your student complete them as they have time. Some take introspection (what book have you read recently and how does it speak to you?) some take research (the typical Why X), let them determine which they feel ready to write.

Applications should be holistic, telling the student's story so their current academics and activities reflect their future plans. Your goal is to want the reader to get to know the student and want to have them on their campus. It takes a lot of effort to shape the application to that point.

Our advice to parents of rising Juniors is start the conversation now. Learn about the process and start visiting schools early, this will give your student a longer time horizon to process the information. Visit (both virtually and in person) a variety of different schools and encourage them to envision themselves in that type of environment. Take tours when you can, learn when colleges are visiting their high schools, research the schools online together, and encourage them to talk with the admissions representatives. Knowledge is power, and in this case information really does alleviate the stress that will build as college application deadlines loom.

An article I read recently noted appropriately: "At its core, college admissions is still a process, a journey of self-reflection and self-discovery. Take the time to appreciate that this is a moment of huge growth for your student, celebrate it and marvel in it, as they become engaged in shaping their future, even if you wish that engagement had happened yesterday."

Need help? Be in touch, here's my calendar, schedule an appointment to talk today.